Scarf Guy dances after Maryland mall shooting: Are Americans too accustomed to violence?

  • 9 years ago
People were dancing in the street and singing into their cellphones on Saturday after a man took a shotgun into a mall, killed two skateboard store attendants and then shot himself.

Wait, no, only one person was dancing, smiling and chatting away on his cellphone while trying to get a look at the cameras — a hipster!

What is America's youth coming to? They don't even know you're supposed to act sad for at least three days, then engage in one week of arguments with people who disagree about where guns come from (cabbage patch vs. Michigan debate) and then, finally, you may take the whole situation lightly and lampoon even the thought of trying to get gun violence under control. Mr. Scarfy McScarfington clearly forgot steps one and two and thought he'd skip straight to the "I'm over it, bro" stage. But isn't that just so typically hipster? "Yeah, I was over it before anybody else."

It's that kind of cavalier attitude toward other people's grief which is collapsing the entire American grief economy! If you don't take our apparently sincere-and-yet-totally-ineffective condolences to the victims of gun violence seriously, then we'll be forced to concede that the US really doesn't do one freaking thing about its gun problem. Then where would that leave us? The nation would be full of disaffected youth who smoke American Spirits and ride fixie bikes to the OK Corral, where they shoot each other in the beards and don't even act sad about it. Disgusting!

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